Friday, May 14, 2010

Can a Baby Sling Bring You Closer to Christ?

A guest commentary from our friend Clare - Especially interested in you comments on this one!!

"It occurred to me recently that slings - you know, those variously shaped and sized baby-holders that parents use to hold their babies - all the rage since attachment parenting burst on the scene over a decade ago - could lead to a religious revival.

My thinking goes something like this: it seems to me there is a catch-22 between the breakdown of the family and the breakdown of faith in modern society. It's hard to say which came first, but it does seem that conversely, the reconstruction of either one would lead to the reconstruction of the other.

Since children have grown up in broken families, without anyone really knowing or loving them, it only makes sense that they would have a hard time understanding the filial love of the Father or feeling any real obligation to reciprocate that love in some way.

And while we will always have broken families among us, this new phenomenon of the baby sling has arisen in the last ten years or so. When I had my first child almost eleven years ago, I received a sling as a gift and as far as I remember, it was the only type of baby sling being made at the time. Today, my go-to website for baby carriers, milkface.com, offers upwards of fifty varieties of slings, including the Blue Celery, the Chimparoo, and the Peekaru. I do believe that the rise in the baby sling's popularity offers some small measure of hope for those of us who pray for the healing of the family. Here you have parents who are committed to attachment parenting. They "wear" their babies for hours, developing the parent-child bond as well as the child's ability to bond later in life with other people.

SO, if the sling thing works, then these children would be more bonded to their parents, more able to bond to other people, and - presumably - more able to understand, receive and reciprocate the love of God the Father, Jesus the Good Shepherd, and the Holy Spirit, the Advocate.

And if they are more able, don't you think we might see real faith begin to grow - a real Revival?

The thought of it kinda makes me want to strap my 10-month-old on right now!"

15 comments:

  1. Oh My goodness... this reminds me of the whole "attachment parenting is Catholic parenting" debate. Ug. Ug. Ug.

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  2. I definitely use baby slings and love them for the convenience and for bonding. However, I would use caution when stating, "Here you have parents who are committed to attachment parenting." I use baby slings, and I would not categorize my parenting style as "attachment parenting" (this seems to be a pretty loaded phrase anyway). I also know many Catholic parents who are loving, prayerful, and attentive but are not baby wearers.

    I think it is far fetched to state that baby slings could lead a religious revival. The breakdown of the family is arguably the most incidious problem in our society, and surely stronger bonds between parents and children are necessary to combat the problem. Baby slings can definitely facilitate healthy parent-child relationships, but there are so many more components to rearing healthy children and building healthy families. I think slings are great, but it does not seem wise to pin the salvation of society on these contraptions or one specific parenting style.

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  3. Great thoughts!! Thank you so much! I have heard over and over again that children from disattached and broken families have a hard time bonding with or understanding the love of God for His children. I have used slings and baby carriers for all of my nine children. I believe it has enhanced our bonding. Thank you again for your insight and God bless you!

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  4. No, attachment parenting is not catholic parenting. And not all sling users are "attachment parents". But the point here is that a desire to wear a baby close to your body for hours on end is a desire to bond closely with that child. Not the only way mind you, but certainly evidence of that desire. And the fact that there is a market for 50+ (seems more like hundreds) of slings is evidence that LOTS of parents are really interested in fostering that bond, which the author argues can only help the child's parental image of, and relationship to, God the Father.

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  5. Don't get me wrong- I have a sling and use it. But I just don't see the causal link between my daughter being in the sling, and her being "more able to understand, receive and reciprocate the love of God". Come on! Isn't that a bit simplistic?! Show me the study that shows that "slinged" babies become faithful Catholic adults.

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  6. There are studies that prove that if a child is more bonded with thier parent they are more able to understand the love that God has for His children. Greg and Lisa Popcak speak about it frequently. That's certainly not to say that if you weren't slung as a child (I wasn't) that you will never be able to bond with God. That being said, I don't believe that you understand the point that the author was trying to make. It seems you feel pretty strongly that there is no link between "attachment parenting" and understanding God's love for us. This commentary just one person's opinion/experience. It doesn't have to be the same as yours and it doesn't have to be right or wrong. It's just the way she may see something. God bless you!!

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  7. I agree with Emily's take on this post. God bless you, Clare!

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  8. It IS Catholic to be attached to your child. That's not the same as following a set of "rules" for attachment parenting, but attachemnt in and of itself IS the Catholic way to parent. Slings facilitate attachment. That doesn't mean you have to use a baby sling to be a good Catholic parent, but I do believe God is calling us to be "attached" to our chldren (again, not the same thing as following a bunch of "rules" in attachment parenting).

    Slings can help us do that, doesn't mean they are necessary, but they can make it easier, and generally parents who use slings are making attachment a priority.

    I find it very hopeful that more and more parents are making attachment a priority with their children. With all the ways our society is going downhill, I do think that increased rates of babywearing and breastfeeding are one way our society is actually moving in the right direction.

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  9. Baby wearing can be a child's very first experience of self-donative love. Sure, you could put a baby in a bouncer, in a crib, playpen, etc. and get some things done on your own but instead you have chosen to keep them close, show them that they are a priority even when it isn't the most easy or convenient (and certainly when it is!)

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  10. I also believe that heading in a more attachment parenting direction (as the above poster pointed out, no specific rules necessarily) will be a great way for children to feel the love and bond needed to understand God's love for us.

    Holding my babies close (in slings or not!), nursing them, spending almost 24/7 with them does help them to feel loved, and I believe that love will help them grow in faith, and understand the love of Christ.

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  11. I believe it only makes sense to keep your baby close to you while they are infants. I held both my sons in baby backpacks and front carriers all the time. Hiking, walking day or night in the warm sun and even in the winter all bundled up!

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  12. I have found that by NOT using a sling, the child receives much love and caring attention from other family members, and therefor are attached to the entire family. Nursing the baby gives me plenty of time to attach to her and hold her and nurture her. Slings are convenient, but not really a moral issue.

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  13. Call me an extremest and tell me I'm crazy- but I agree with Clare. I will even take it a step further and say that any form of sacrifice made (like wearing your baby or choosing to stay home with them ) with a heart of service is making that momma (or big sister, or brother, or aunt, etc)more HOLY! Quite a claim I know, but when a child is surrounded with folks who do the right thing ( loving,nursing,cuddling, reading a book) for a child, it is a demonstration of what Jesus does for us. He laid down His life. If we are able to do that with our kids, it is a model for them and everyone watching, and if you buy the right sling/ carrier it doesn't have to feel like carrying a cross. I love my ERGO baby carrier!

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  14. I never believe the statement "studies show that..." without a link to the actual study. It's a lazy way of saying "I think X and someone once told me X so there must be some evidence of X..." Usually not.

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  15. I didn't want to chime in on this. I have seen so many broken families in my life. I have watched in horror, Dads who treat their kids like dogs. As a father of 7 I am stunned at just cruel people can be to these gifts from Christ. Spending a life in Public Safety it is clear something is not working. If a baby sling can bring parents closer to the children, and children closer to the family, thus bringing all closer to God..Go for it! We need all the help we can get, and "Anonymous" if you’re going to be negative, have the guts to post your name!

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